Divining the Masculine

This essay on religion, science, gender and the Earth is one of the most difficult things I’ve written.

Part One ~ Part Two

The composition process felt like torture. I fully expected it would require serious revision, but it was accepted and published as-is in the collection Finding the Masculine in Goddess’ Spiral: Men in Ritual, Community, and Service to the Goddess (2016, Immanion Press). It’s been a year, and now it can be republished electronically, so I’m gratified to share this via Return to Mago.

I Think I'm in Love


We think the baby dropped sometime yesterday or the day before. Xy is feeling a lot better and seems to have a lot more energy.

Speaking of dropping, perhaps it’s time to drop the pretense that we’re keeping the child’s sex a secret.

See, four or five months ago Xy asked me if we should opt to discover the child’s sex in advance. I said, “Let’s find out but keep it a secret.” I thought that would give us something to announce when the child was actually born.

And so, back in October, I got a one-word text message from Xy informing me of the child’s gender. I wrote that I knew something you didn’t. Meanwhile, unbeknownst to me, Xy was calling and/or texting most everyone she knew.

This led to the awkward situation of her parents knowing something that my parents didn’t. My parents were content to wait until March, since that seemed to be our wish. But in reality Xy had told half the population of the United States. Soon I started telling people when it came up in conversation. Eventually I had to call my parents on the phone and fill them in. I didn’t want to hurt their feelings, after all. They should not be the last to know.

I’m still not publishing this factoid on the internet. To any who remain curious, I offer the following hint. We’ve been astonished by the blatantly sexist responses of some people when we tell them. Are you disappointed? Are you gonna try again? People are a trip.


Just found out the sex of our impending child, via text message from Xy. However, I’m not posting it here. We need something to announce in March, right? Also, I need to sort out just how much of this child’s life is going to be subject to my compulsive communicating. And finally, it’s another opportunity for me to say: I know something you don’t.

More importantly, today’s ultrasound returned a clean bill of health: the usual number of limbs and organs and whatnot. So far, so good. Xy’s also checked out fine.

Slowly but surely, this abstraction is becoming a reality.

Assault of the Phonebot

I just got a phone call from a robot which ranted about how many women didn’t vote in the last election. It exhorted me to “Press one if you promise to vote this November.” Confused by my manhood, I didn’t press anything, and the recorded voice said “Thank you,” and hung up.