Archive for the 'Letters' Category

Dear Stefano Pessina

Friday, January 9th, 2015

Walgreens Boots Alliance, Inc. 108 Wilmot Road Deerfield, IL 60015 9 January 2015 For the attention of Stefano Pessina Executive Vice Chairman Responsible for Strategy and Mergers and Acquisitions Dear Stefano, Let me be amongst the first to congratulate you on the recent coup. That Wasson guy was a fly in the gravy, but now […]

To My Aunt

Friday, May 25th, 2012

BART, you probably haven’t read about this [forwarded message: Why Did Jesus Fold the Napkin?] ––––– you are so brilliant, and I understand how your mind was to reject Jesus, but He is the only way to salvation, He is the only God who died on the cross for our sins–––statues of buddah, baal and […]

Epistle to the Ecotopians

Thursday, May 10th, 2012

I don’t often do this, but here are some words written by someone else. I guess I should add a few words of my own. I read Ecotopia in the late 80s. Written by Ernest Callenbach, it’s an imaginative novel that speculates on what would happen if the west coast of the United States seceded […]

Saving Grace

Monday, December 12th, 2011

It’s come to my attention that the Episcopal Diocese is planning to close Grace Episcopal Church on Canal Street in the first Sunday in January. This would be a major blow in my opinion. Below is a letter to the bishop urging him to reconsider this decision. Though sent on behalf of my role in […]

Dear Mom & Dad

Sunday, October 30th, 2011

Dear Mom & Dad, It’s a good time of year to honor ancestors. Many traditions focus on ancestors who have passed away. My genealogical research indicates that the overwhelming majority of our ancestors are in this category. In fact, of direct living ancestors I have but two: the two of you. However much we honor […]

Dear Netflix

Wednesday, December 1st, 2010

Dear Netflix, After many years of loyal patronage, I will be canceling my Netflix membership at the end of December. As we’ve shared so many delightful years together I thought you deserved an explanation, so I’m writing this letter to spell it all out for you. I’ve been with you from almost the beginning. I […]

Dear Mr. Marcello

Friday, October 1st, 2010

1025 Bienville St Suite 5 New Orleans LA 70112 Dear Mr. Marcello, My wife and I recently purchased a house nearby, and we have been very happy to see the renovation activity at 4337-4339 Banks Street. In fact, I supported the zoning change you recently sought for that property, though some of my neighbors did […]

Dear Mr. Bissell (2)

Friday, September 10th, 2010

Bissell Homecare, Inc.
 PO Box 3606 
Grand Rapids MI 49501 For the attention of Mark J. Bissell, President & CEO Dear Mr. Bissell, Goodness gracious! I’ve just been going through some old files, and I realized it’s been one full year since I wrote to you. I have yet to receive the courtesy of a […]

Dear Mr. Bissell

Thursday, September 10th, 2009

Bissell Homecare, Inc. PO Box 3606 Grand Rapids MI 49501 For the attention of Mark J. Bissell, President & CEO Dear Mr. Bissell, We recently purchased a Lift-Off Revolution Remanufactured 3760R vacuum cleaner produced by your company. During its second use, the stretch hose came detached from the hose grip, rendering the whole apparatus inoperable. […]

Dear Humana

Wednesday, September 2nd, 2009

Humana P.O. Box 14546 Lexington KY 40512-4610 Sept. 2, 2009 Dear Humana, I recently took my daughter to a doctor in our neighborhood. I took special care to make sure this doctor was a “participating provider,” because I know how important that is to you. (I made the mistake of going to a “non participating […]

Entergy Writes Back

Thursday, July 30th, 2009

Remember that letter I sent to Entergy? I got a reply. July 22, 2009 Dear Mr. Everson As Director of Customer Service at Entergy New Orleans, Inc., I wanted to thank you for your recent letter regarding the hours of operation at our Customer Care Center located on Canal Blvd. The business hours of the […]

Dear Mr. West

Friday, July 17th, 2009

Entergy New Orleans 1600 Perdido St New Orleans, LA 70112 Attn: Rod West, President & CEO Dear Mr. West, I just had a brilliant idea on how Entergy can improve customer service in New Orleans. Please allow me to explain. Every morning I ride my bike past the Entergy office located at the corner of […]

Dear Aunt Ron

Tuesday, May 5th, 2009

Dear Aunt Ron, Thanks for Persephone’s birthday gift. It will probably take her a while to grow into those clothes, but better too big than too small. I also appreciated the letter you included. Rest assured, I won’t “disown” you for the suggestions you make regarding Persephone’s religious education. In fact I am touched that […]

Dear Mr. Carrere

Thursday, April 23rd, 2009

Dear Mr. Carrere, Your name was given to me as a good person to contact in Code Enforcement for the City of New Orleans. Unfortunately a number of homes in my immediate neighborhood remain hazardous eyesores that have not been properly remediated since the floods of 2005. Today I am writing to you about what […]

Dear Goody Clancy

Wednesday, April 22nd, 2009

Here’s a letter which I hope to present directly to representatives of Goody Clancy at tonight’s District 4 meeting (6PM @ Jesuit). Dear Goody Clancy, Friends of Lafitte Corridor has been reviewing the Master Plan draft. It is quite impressive. However, there are several points that concern us. We believe that the revitalization of the […]

Dear General Zia

Tuesday, April 14th, 2009

This is the second installment of three sample documents dredged up from my old Brother WP-500 disks. I think this letter more or less explains itself. I wrote a number of such letters, inspired by author Bruce West, and in fact that was my original motivation for purchasing the WP-500 in the first place. With […]

Dear Coby

Tuesday, December 23rd, 2008

One of the key tensions in my relationship with Xy has to do with television. To put it bluntly, she’s for it and I’m against it. I long ago gave up the battle to keep television out of our home, but at least we don’t pay for cable or satellite. We get our TV off […]


Tuesday, July 24th, 2007

This arrived in the mail yesterday with no return address. View the large version for easier reading. Note: I cut the writer’s name off to preserve his/her privacy. This letter is in response to the most recent article about us in the Times-Picayune. The writer means well, but the discerning reader will not have to […]

Good Neighbors

Tuesday, June 26th, 2007

It was good to see a letter from my neighbor on the editorial page of the Times-Picayune this weekend. (Note: The “Good Neighbor Program” started off as a city ordinance that dictated storm damaged homes must to be gutted and secured one year after Katrina. We are now approaching the two-year mark.) Not such a […]

Secret Admirer

Friday, March 2nd, 2007

Xy has a secret admirer. She found this letter in her purse yesterday. click to enlarge Note that she teaches 6th grade, so this isn’t from one of her students.